Zooey Deschanel

Whilst at a hipster gathering the other week I was able to witness something that every altboy dreams of seeing and something every altgirl dreams to be: Zooey Deschanel. There she was, "in the flesh", only a sea of phony guys pretending to like She & Him separating me from her. She was definitely 'the one'.

Seeing her IRL confirmed it for me. With her lil fringe flopping around as she jumped up and down like an over excited child, I Knew she was 4 me. So what did I do? I went to get myself a piece of that Zooey cake. And I wouldn't settle for the leftovers, either. Nope, this was my one chance to get "the real deal." What I was going to do was, as soon as She & Him finished playing, go round to the back where all the bands "chilled" 2gether, and pretend to be one of her roadies. I would then get inside the She & Him tourbus where I would put a pillow under my t-shirt and wear some really long ass fake sideburns. I would then take my trousers off and lie sprawled across Zooey's bed, pretending to be her beloved Ben Gibbard. By the time she realised (ten seconds tops?), it would already be too late. I will have had my way. Jus' better hope M. Ward doesn't walk in. Fuckin' M. Ward.

Unfortunately just as I was about to put this plan into motion I realised this way obscure visual arts band called The Residents were about to start on another stage. Seeing these would boost my indie cred +30 indie points. Whilst bangin' Zooey would have boosted it +1000000 indie points, the plan probably wouldn't have worked anyway. And Ben Gibbard would have been pissed at me (-100000). And M. Ward, too. Fuckin' M. Ward. Read More......

Top Ten Sexiest Men Of Comedy

Genetics are mean. Either you win the genetic lottery and grow into a drop dead gorgeous vision of Brad Pitt or, well, you’re not so lucky. Usually you are given something as compensation, whether it be brains, creativity or wit. The world of comedy isn’t a pretty one, it has to be said, but some lucky sods, like the ones we feature below, not only get the face of a heartthrob but the funny gene to boot.

1. Russell Howard

Perhaps best known for being a permanent face on BBC’s political panel show Mock the Week, Russell Howard, whilst quizzing my schoolmates for ideas was the first name on everyone’s lips. With his baby face, blonde hair and cheeky grin, this comedian not only tickles our funny bones but pulls on our heartstrings too.

2. Russell Brand

The bad boy of comedy! This man has come a long way from hosting ‘Big Brothers Big Mouth’, a side project of the reality TV show Big Brother. Nowadays you’ll find him starring in big Hollywood movies like Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Bedtime Stories and St Trinians. Russell Brand is known for his big hair, flamboyant vocabulary and his many bed partners. We think he’s gorgeous!

3. Paddy McGuiness

Paddy McGuiness was first introduced to the public in Peter Kay’s Phoenix Nights and Max and Paddy’s Road to Nowhere and he quickly became a household name. With eyes that could melt the masses and a naked spread for Cosmo, this Bolton boy has definitely caught the eye of many a woman, especially readers of Cosmo.

4. Noel Fielding

Noel Fielding first got recognition for his comedic genius alongside Julian Barratt in the surreally funny TV show and stand up tour The Mighty Boosh in which Fielding played Vince Noir. Fielding stole the hearts of the nation with his tight trousers, carefree spirit and eccentric persona. In 2008 Fielding not only snagged The Best Dressed Male award at the NME’s, he also managed to grab The Sexiest Male award too. We can’t help but agree.

5. Simon Amstell

Simon Amstell despite being sacked from his first TV gig at Nickelodeon for being "sarcastic and mean to children.", this bushy-haired comedian hasn’t stopped growing in our hearts. From hosting Popworld and Never Mind The Buzzcocks, a panel show with a rock music theme and having two very successful stand up tours, one which is currently doing the rounds, Amstell has captured the nation with his sarcastic one liners, indie clothes and of course, the bushy hair.

6. Jimmy Carr

Jimmy Car, the man with the straightest face in British comedy. Clearly sarcasm is sexy as Carr (not to be confused with the other Carr, Alan) and despite not having any awards to prove his sexiest, his straight talking, edgy comedy has made many women wobble weak at the knees.

7. Ant and Dec

The legendry comedy duo. Newcastle’s finest, Ant (on the left ) and Dec (on the right ) have been doing the rounds for ages since their wee years in Byker Grove and the Saturday morning smash SM:TV live along with Cat Deeley. Nowadays you can see the cheeky Geordies on I’m a Celebrity…Get me Out of Here!, Saturday Night Takeaway and Britain Got Talent. Both as always beautifully dressed and looking sharp, but it is the sheer extremity of the bromance that has this girl hooked. We still never know which is which though…

8. Robert Webb

One half of the comedy duo Mitchell and Webb. Robert Webb was voted 88^th Sexiest Man in the World by New Woman Magazine and has starred in many TV and sketch shows alongside his partner David Mitchell as well as in several projects on his own. Robert Webb has also been seen on the silver screen in Confetti and Magicians. Honestly, I can see why he got that award.

9. James Cordon and Matthew Horne

Our friendship group has an unhealthy obsession with James Cordon (on the right), in fact the owner of this blog, Eileen wakes up to see him on her ceiling every morning. Whilst being on the larger side of comedy, James Cordon somehow manages to be absolutely gorgeous and completely irrestible. Matthew Horne is not much different. You can find both in the movie Lesbian Vampire Killers (yes, its actually how it sounds) and on the telly in Gavin and Stacey, which I urge you to watch.

10. Michael McIntyre

Michael McIntyre is known for appearing on a multitude of comedy panel shows and stand up tours including his own Michael McIntyre’s Comedy Road Show. McIntyre is laugh-out-loud funny and his isocyanides make him adorable to watch.

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